Thoughts of a Lunatic: The Ex One, Blood on Lampard’s Hands and Other Talking Points

In the world of football these days, be careful of what you say or do because what you say or do shall be used to drag you in the court of banter.

The UEFA Champions League and Europa League quarterfinal draws must have been made while you are reading this. We already know those that were booted out. Some GOATs were pulled out with their horns, no one confused their bleatings for the roaring of lions. One of the GOATs even promised to deliver a Champions League trophy, just as a Nigerian musician promised to deliver the Grammy. To be nice to him, he was one of those that inspired those that have finally delivered it. Back to the GOAT, the matter is about even keeping him in his barn right now before there can be talks of delivering another Champions League trophy.

The Ex One

Jose Mourinho has had many monikers in his managerial career. The first and the most popular one being The Special One. He was indeed special, he delivered trophies wherever he went to. The name Mourinho became synonymous with success. He called fellow managers names and dragged many of them in the mud.

Once a special one

On joining Tottenham, he gave himself a new moniker – the Experienced One. According to him, he had seen it all. The highs and the lows, getting fired and getting hired. After the disapointment of Manchester United, he appears to have seen it all, there is barely any top club that will want to take the risk on Mourinho any longer. He however made a mistake, the moniker should start with ‘Ex’ but should be the Expired One. Taking over at Tottenham was seen as a sign of his fallen stocks and it wouldn’t have gotten worse than losing a 2-0 first leg lead against Dynamo Zagreb. By the way, Dynamo Zagreb’s manager left his post on the eve of the second leg as he is set to go to jail. This is win should have been his get out of jail card but his imprisonment has nothing to do with football.

Blood on Lampard’s Hands

Since Thomas Tuchel took over at Chelsea, there has been a complete turn around from the Frank Lampard years. Chelsea seems to be enjoying more than a new managers bounce under Tuchel. They have not lost in 13 and have kept 11 clean sheets in that time. Chelsea and clean sheets were hardly in the same sentence during Lampard’s reign. They drank goals like 33 Lager beer. Though Kepa ‘Aribisagba’ had his own shortcomings, he was largely a scapegoat of a poor system. The team looks very solid under Tuchel, with the same set of players.

Chelsea could barely defend under Lampard

Many of the players looked bad bar Lampard’s beloved son – Mason Mount. Lampard has blood on his hands for how bad he made Chelsea look.

It is not absolute fun saying positives about Chelsea or anyone as far as the Lunatic is concerned. I hope Roman Abramovich feels bored very soon, sacks Tuchel and brings in maybe Didier Drogba, so we have more fun things to say.

In other matters. So Arsenal does a clear out that involves Sokratis Papastho… whatever. He plays against Arsenal with Olympiakos Piraeus at the Emirates stadium and he leaves with a clean sheet. Luckily for Arsenal, they had done the job in the first leg. And also luckily for them, they won’t be playing against Schalke 04 anytime soon.

That’s all that came to the mind of the Lunatic today. See you some other time.

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Thoughts of a Lunatic: Musa Still At The Gate, Anfield Poultry and Other Talking Points

The various top European Leagues are gradually reaching the business end. Some titles already won and some relegation cards already signed, ready to be delivered. Some European places dreams are also becoming mirages. In England, Harry and Meghan can not take the shine from VAR.

There is also the matter of national teams gathering at the end of the month for various qualifiers. In Nigeria, Gernot Rohr’s Super Eagles list has come with its usual controversies and talking points.

Anfield Poultry

How Liverpool’s home ground – Anfield went from being a fortress to a forest has to be studied in the university. After going for three years without a defeat at home, a record 64 matches. They have started another record with six straight defeats and still counting at home afterwards. In that time, they have scored just one goal at Anfield, albeit from the penalty spot. Anfield has gone from a Lion’s den to becoming a poultry where teams just go to slaughter chickens for dinner. Rather than opponents failing to come out alive, they come out alive with goodies. Sadio Mane and Mohammed Salah have gone from destroyers to destroyed. Thiago Alcantara was supposed to improve the team in midfield but the only positive stats he has are his number of thumbs up. In his short time in England, he has given more thumbs up than any player in the Premier League history, something in the region of hundred thousand or thereabout. Liverpool are blessed with the presence of ‘thumbs-up Xavi’. More bookings than goals and assists.

Thumbs up Xavi

Jurgen Klopp should find a solution as Liverpool have gone from title contenders to European places contenders, before they slip into relegation contenders.

After all said, Klopp and his Liverpool team have delivered the once elusive Premier League title, the first in 30 years. Maybe Liverpudians will have to wait another thirty years for another triumph.

Musa still at gate

Wetin Musa no dey see for gate? Ahmed Musa has been in the Super Eagles for so long that he has seen it all. But even Musa has hardly seen a clubless player invited to the Super Eagles. The last time Musa kicked a ball in anger was in October 2020 but he still gets an invitation to the Super Eagles, ahead of active players.

Rohr could as well invite the likes of Daniel Amokachi, Kanu Nwankwo and the others since it is for experience, as some have posited. What if Musa is injured? He will still be in the team on crutches, since Musa must be at the gate to see it all.

Musa is at the gate.

Musa must be at the gate to also make sure COVID-19 protocols will be observed when the Super Eagles play in Lagos. There is a lot Musa does in the team than can be explained.

In a team, just as you have playing footballers, you also have non-playing footballers. People should understand these things.

Ole Stealing The Show and The Points

Manchester United dilemma continues. They don’t look like they will really challenge for the title anytime soon but there is a new knack for stealing the show.

With Ole Gunnar Solskjaer in charge, the Red Devils have produced some very impressive results that ends up leading nowhere. Solskjaer has a good record against Pep Guardiola and he continued that at the weekend. Manchester City were on a winning run of 20 matches but Ole struck again. Dem no reach 21. That is an achievement.

Well, it is part of keeping the tradition of the Red Devils as ‘kill-joys’. Arsenal were on a 49-match unbeaten run back in 2005, Manchester United stopped them from reaching 50 by returning them to factory settings. Even if Ole has not delivered titles, he is bringing back the tradition.

It seems Manchester United fans must get used to celebrating these wins as they seems like the one thing Ole will always deliver.

Ronaldo in Black and White

Cristiano Ronaldo’s time in Juventus so far has been black and white. Of what use is Ronaldo at Juventus if they won’t win the Champions League?

Ronaldo is still delivering the goals and has an impressive goals record in Turin but Juventus have failed to make it beyond the Quarter-finals of the Champions League since he joined. Of what use are the goals? They are on the verge of losing the league title, which was like their birth right.

Ronaldo in black and white

It is looking like, when he is done in Juventus, he will have an impressive goals record to show but little in terms of silverware, meaning Juventus will have nothing to show for signing Ronaldo. While you can not blame Ronaldo, the recent defeat against Porto was the type he used to ‘single-handedly’ decide. Anyways, he is in good company with the likes of Gianluggi Buffon, Giorgio Chiellini in a group of pensioners enjoying their benefits.

Thoughts of a Lunatic: Elder Pele, Penalty War and other Talking Points

Happy New Year to all lunatics and everyone else. This is the first Thoughts of a Lunatic for the year, it should be much more civil or maybe.

COVID-19 is threatening to truncate football calendars once again, football is battling hard to stay alive. We should not be having pandemic champions and or tainted achievements back-to-back. In the wake of Leeds United vs Pundit – Karen Carney, another induced break will take something away from achievements. For those that don’t know about Carney vs Leeds gist, you have to read it up somewhere, I don’t tell stories here but I will judge by saying Leeds were completely classless. Away from that I have some other matters to talk about.

Elder Pele

Edson Arantes do Nascimento, also known as Pele is a name that will forever remain indelible in the history of football. Pele is unarguably one of the greatest to ever play the game. But as expected, the throne of the greatest ever has not been surrendered to him. He was in a kind of battle for the GOAT with Diego Maradona till Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo came and started disgracing all known numbers.

Pele is in a battle to keep his records

Pele’s recorded official goals were so much that one thought it will take some robots to break it. There were even arguments that he scored more than the recorded numbers.

Just recently Messi broke his record for goals scored for one club. Santos, the club Pele achieved the feat with, came out to say Pele scored more than they recorded. Recently, Ronaldo also overtook Pele on the number of official goals, Pele’s social media bio was edited to say ‘leading goalscorer of all-time’ with over 1,000 goals.

As it stands, no one is allowed to surpass Elder Pele, his numbers will be adjusted as appropriate when needed. All the goals he scored when playing ‘monkey post’ in Brazil has to be included. Make Baba rest jare. At least his World Cup record is safe.

Kicking the flag

There is an idiom known as ‘kicking the bucket’. Another idiom has just been invented – kicking the flag.

So, let me tell you the meaning of kicking the flag, how it should be used and its origin.

You can your breath after kicking the flag

When a striker is bought for big money and he fails to score goals, he can be said to have kicked the flag. E.g Timo Werner is kicking the flag at Chelsea. The idiom is in honor of Werner who has had more embarrassing misses than goals at Chelsea. Werner has missed when it was easier to score than to miss.

It is however surprising that Lampard prefers a misfiring Werner upfront to an Olivier Giroud. The last time Werner scored was in the first week of November. It appears Chelsea have a German Alvaro Morata on their hands. Even Chelsea have kicked the flag.

Penalty War

A penalty war is brewing in the Premier League. Who gets awarded more penalties? So when a team struggles in a match, could hardly muster shots on target, the coach can come out to talk about the number penalties they get compared to other teams.

Kudos to Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, he has gotten Manchester United into title conversations. Jurgen Klopp and his Liverpool side lose at Southampton and Klopp’s excuse was to compare Manchester United penalty numbers, really? Agreed some of the penalty calls may be questionable but hey Mr Klopp, that was not why you lost to Southampton.

Penalty shouts coming out loud

For Manchester United fans, they should be happy they have gotten into title conversations but we all know that they are semi-final champions under Solskjaer. Just yesterday, they lost another semi-final match to Manchester City in the Carabao Cup and will now play the third place match against Brentford. We won’t be surprised when they start battling for third again in the Premier League.

That’s all for today, once again welcome to the new year. Follow Goaldball across social media – goaldball on Facebook and Instagram, and @goaldbal on Twitter. Don’t follow the Lunatic anywhere, who follows a Lunatic by the way?

Thoughts of a Lunatic: Football’s Tom and Jerry and other talking points

The English Premier League has made sure we still have lots of football to watch during the Yuletide. The Nigeria Professional Football League also joined, and La Liga too. Most of the talking points have been from the Premier League, just as COVID-19 is threatening to disturb the season once again, and turn us to Telemundo viewers.

The Lunatic believes you have had a nice Christmas celebration. Even Mohammed Salah and other Muslim footballers were not left out in enjoying the season. The beauty of football, the game that unites all. I am making too much sense today, to my own surprise, I am probably still in holiday mood. Anyways, I saw plenty recently in the world of football, I will share some.

Second season syndrome getting wild

The record for the worst Premier League return stands at 11 points, set by Derby county in a year I can’t remember. Yes, a team played 38 matches and had just 11 points, they didn’t pull out (that didn’t come out right) halfway as is possible in a certain league. Sheffield United are threatening to break that record, they have just two points from 16 matches and have not won a match. At this rate, they will finish with around five points.

For a team that was wilding last season after just gaining promotion, no one would have thought the second season syndrome will hit them this bad. They were on the verge of qualifying for Europe last season and were one of the most organized teams in the league.

Luckily for them, they play in the Premier League. If they were a team in one Plateau in the Nigerian league, they will have no salaries by now. They would have gone from being placed on half salaries, to quarter salaries to no salaries.

As we start our farewell to Sheffield United, we enjoyed their wilding while it lasted.

Football’s Tom and Jerry

An idea for a football comic will be Tom and Jerry, Ronaldo and Messi edition. I can’t say who will be Tom and who will be Jerry. One of football’s greatest rivalry has created lots of funny plots.

Messi and Ronaldo rivalry remains legendary

While they were the main contenders for the major awards, they didn’t use to vote for each other. Messi will rather vote for Ahmed Musa to win the Balon D’Or than vote for Ronaldo. Ronaldo will rather vote for Paul Onuachu than vote for Messi.

Their cat and mouse game has been interesting recently. Messi voted for Ronaldo as second best to win the Balon D’Or in 2019 while Ronaldo didn’t vote for Messi, he voted for the likes of De Jong and De Ligt but Messi won.

In the votes for the 2020 FIFA The Best, Ronaldo decided to reciprocate Messi’s gesture by voting for him in the awards, this time, Messi didn’t vote for Ronaldo. Even though none of them won.

Just recently, Messi hailed Ronaldo as one of the top athletes in the world, just after not voting for him in an awards. The Tom and Jerry game is looking interesting and we are watching.

Diego Costa

Atletico Madrid have released Diego Costa via an official statement. Diego Simeone did not send a text message to Costa that he is no longer needed. That must have made Costa felt better.

The next destination of the fiery Brazilian-Spaniard will be interesting to see. He has had a very interesting career. His first spell at Atletico Madrid was highly successful and he went on to also do exploits at Chelsea till he ‘broke bottle’ at Stamford Bridge and returned Madrid. Now he has been released by Atletico Madrid, his next destination will be interesting to see.

Diego Costa bids farewell to Atletico Madrid

Thanks for staying with Thoughts of a Lunatic in 2020, this is the last edition of the year. Let’s do it bigger and better in 2021, tell someone to tell someone about Goaldball.

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Thoughts of a Lunatic: The Best Joke, Arsenal Relegation Materials and Other Talking Points

Christmas on my mind. Not just Christmas, money for some detty December. Lunatic sef need money, no be only you. As everywhere dey red, Christmas red and the other red, Arsenal players are also making it red. Red everywhere, as bet tickets dey red, na so eye dey red.

In the world of football, so many talking points, especially the ones inspired by lunacy.

Arsenal Relegation Materials

When I spoke about new London derbies involving Arsenal, QPR, Brentford and the likes, some people thought I was taking it too far. But it is becoming clearer that Arsenal’s relegation materials are almost complete.

After losing a relegation six-pointer against Burnley at the weekend, they got even closer to the relegation zone. They have a young manager learning the ropes – relegation material. Their football is cross, cross and cross – relegation materials. Lots of substandard players – relegation materials.

Arsenal players are up for the relegation fight

One has to wonder if the players are mistaking the call to attack more for a call to attack their opponents. First, Nicholas Pepe, who can’t nod a ball, nods an opponent. Granit Xhaka, sees that they were playing well, boom, he grabs a neck. Minutes later Mohammed Elneny carries out his own attack. Wahala for Arsenal.

The Best Joke

Cristiano Ronaldo plus Lionel Messi plus anyone else is The Best Joke. No matter what any player does, FIFA must have Messi and Ronaldo on their podium. There is already a default list that includes Ronaldo and Messi, it is only edited to include a third person. At this rate, FIFA will still mistakenly include Messi and Ronaldo after they have retired.

As we have seen, there is a penchant of one of the duo (Ronaldo and Messi) that won’t win the award not turning up for the gala. If it goes as expected this year, none of them should show up. Though it will be held virtually this year, they can also stay away virtually. If Lewandowski don’t win this year, we should forget about FIFA The Best and turn to Davido The Best.

Bielsa is up for The Best manger of the year

When Leeds United manager Marcelo Bielsa made the list of the Manager of the Year, eyebrows were raised but to make matters worse he is in the final three. Bielsa is a celebrated manager for his knowledge and approach to the game, that is where it ends. When did winning the Championship become a big deal? Ladan Bosso should be making the list too, since we want to joke.

Neymar’s Prophecy

On the matter of the Champions League and Europa league draws, there is a lot to look forward to in February. Some interesting ties, one of which is Barcelona taking on PSG. Neymar spoke about playing together with Messi, little did we know he was prophesying the tie. We know Neymar’s other talent apart from playing football, acting. Little did we know he also has the gift of prophecy.

Nagelsmann suit will be an highlight

After sending Manchester United packing, RB Leipzig and their young manager come up against another English side – Liverpool. One thing to look forward to will be Julian Nagelsmann’s suit.

Champions League Draws: Who Are The Favorites For The Quarter-finals? 2

In continuation of our Champions League Round of 16 quick preview, we bring you the concluding part.

Porto vs Juventus

Porto were impressive in their group, finishing second to Man. City. They won four, drew one and lost just one against City. There’s Nigerian interest with Zaidu Sanusi playing for FC Porto.

Juventus edged Barcelona to top spot in their group but are yet to hit top gear. Cristiano Ronaldo is yet to set the stage on fire but has a knack of getting into the grove in the knockout rounds. In terms of quality, Juventus looks more equipped but Porto are more recent winners of the tournament, following their 2004 triumph.

Players to watch: Jesus Corona (Porto), Felipe Anderson (Porto), Cristiano Ronaldo (Juventus), Paulo Dybala (Juventus)

Prediction: This is where we expect our first shocker to come from, Porto to scale through.

Barcelona vs PSG

Another titanic battle in the group. Probably the biggest tie of the round. As stated earlier, Barcelona finished second to Juventus in their group, losing top spot on the last day following their only defeat, at home against the Old Lady. The reward of letting go of top spot is a tie against PSG.

The last time both teams met in the second round of the Champions League, they served us a classic, with Barcelona overturning a 4-0 defeat with a 6-1 win at home. PSG recovered from a defeat against Man. United on the opening day, to finish top of their group.

Barcelona will be looking up to Messi

If he is fit, Neymar will be relishing facing his former team. The Brazilian was pivotal in helping Barcelona turn the tides in 2017, now he is on the other side. Barcelona have not been so convincing this season, with Lionel Messi largely a shadow of his old self. PSG have also not been able to find consistency.

Players to watch: Lionel Messi (Barcelona), Antoine Griezmann (Barcelona), Neymar Jr (PSG), Kylian Mbappe (PSG)

Prediction: PSG to go through

Sevilla vs Dortmund

Another almost balanced tie. If it were the Europa League, we would have easily gone for a Sevilla win.

The Europa League champions qualified quite easily behind Chelsea. They look like a compact side but have struggled for goals.

Dortmund qualified quite easily in a group that had Lazio but have been largely inconsistent, especially in the Bundesliga. They have severed ties with their coach Lucien Favre, they should be a different team by February with Erling Haaland also expected back.

Players to watch: Jesus Navas (Sevilla), Ivan Rakitic (Sevilla), Marco Reus (Dortmund), Erling Haaland (Dortmund)

Prediction: Difficult to call, Dortmund to edge it.

Atalanta vs Real Madrid

This should be a mouth watering tie. Atalanta were impressive as they finished second behind Liverpool, winning all their away matches without conceeding a goal. Gian Gasperini’s men have not been at their attacking best but they seem more pragmatic this term.

Zidane has won the Champions League thrice as a manager

Real Madrid left it late to qualify. They picked just a point from their first two matches and stood the risk of an embarrassing group stage exit. They eventually made it, top of their group. They have not been really impressive but they have the knack of getting the job done when it matters.

Players to watch: Alenjandro Gomes (Atalanta), Mario Pasalic (Atalanta), Karim Benzema (Real Madrid), Sergio Ramos (Real Madrid)

Prediction: We expect a shocker from here, Atalanta to go through.

Thoughts of a Lunatic: New London Derby, Ole In and Out and other Talking Points

What is the world without football? I wonder how people who don’t like football cope. It has been a week of gbas gbos both on the pitch and off the pitch. I am sure you are enjoying the various drama as I have. There is also a lot to look forward to in midweek football. There may be some premium tears. There is also the little matter of a Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo clash in the Champions League. Some years back, it would have been one to look forward to, but now, it looks more like that Mike Tyson vs Roy Jones choreography dance drama.

New London Derby

Change is the only constant thing in life and variety is the spice of life. Arsenal fans have been used to seeing their team play London derbies against the likes of Chelsea, West Ham, Tottenham etc. in the Premier League. There will be nothing bad if they start playing league Derbies against the likes of QPR, Brentford, Millwall and the likes. Not because these clubs are on the verge of gaining promotion to the Premier League but because Arsenal are closer to going to join them.

Areta his doing his IT at Arsenal

Arsenal’s record this season is there for every Arsene, Pier and Mesut to see. They have lost more than they have won. They have conceded more than they have scored. They have celebrated Ozil Twitter jibed than they have celebrated goals.

In the wake of Jose Mourinho giving Arsenal and Mikel Arteta plaudits after his Tottenham side defeated them, Arsenal fans should be worried. Mourinho does not give you plaudits, except when he doesn’t see you as a rival. Mourinho does not see Arsenal as rivals. New rivals on the horizon for Arsenal while their coach completes his IT.

Ole In and Out

Depending on what RB Leipzig does or doesn’t do against Manchester United this week, Manchester United could join Arsenal on the Thursday train. A qualification that looked all but wrapped after a good start in a group that has PSG could end up with a round-of-32 Thursday night tie in Cyprus or Azerbaijan.

The result will also determine the ole in – ole out music. We are used to hearing Ole in one minute and then Ole out the next. In their last two Premier League matches, it was Ole out at halftime but became Ole in by full-time. It could be ole ole ole… the song of the fans or ole! ole! ole!… the song of the market for a thief.

Pogba is said to be unhappy at Manchester United

Still on Manchester United, it seems Paul Pogba has finished his holiday at the club, according to his agent Mino Raiola. A return that was so celebrated like that of a princely prodigal son is about to end with both parties largely disappointed. Pogback is turning to ‘Pogpark and go’.

Barcelona casted

Barcelona are also going down like Arsenal, they may be missing their local rivals too – Espanyol. Another defeat, against Cadiz this time has taken them down to ninth, 12 points away from the top.

In the days when Messi was Messi, this was the type of match he used to win singlehandedly when his teammates don’t turn up. Now that the real Messi has been replaced with Jubril Messi, Barcelona don cast.

In Andre Ter Stegen, Barcelona may be having their own ‘Kepa’. Donating points to opponents with some comedic goalkeeping.

The lunatic is done for today. Tell somebody to tell somebody to keep it a date with the Lunatic and other contents on goaldball.com. Follow us across social media platform @goalball except twitter which is @goalbal (someone took the L). The Lunatic will be back in a jiffy.

Boald Codes: Chelsea, Bayern and other Betting Tips for the Weekend

Christmas is coming, everybody dey find money. Just as you are picking those games and believing that you will win some money for detty December, the betting companies are also waiting to receive your money for their Christmas bonus. If you have been careful before, you have to be extra careful now. Especially with how some expected sure teams have been falling short. Last weekend was red, o bad gan. We have tried selecting some games but most especially give you tips, which you should consider following.

The North London derby is the biggest match of the weekend

Bankers

Many things being equal, these results should come through. They are the ones we can bank our money on. Also because the odds are good.

In form Chelsea host Leeds United at the Stamford Bridge. Leeds, usually involved in high scoring matches have had better defensive records in their last two matches, keeping two clean sheets and scoring one in their last two. However, things should be different against Chelsea. Trust a goals game, over 2.5 comes at about over 1.5.

In La Liga, second-placed Atletico Madrid will host 17th placed Real Valladolid. You can trust Atletico to win, it comes at around 1.4.

Big game in Germany, Bayern Munich host RB Leipzig. It is first vs second. Bayern always win this sort of games. You can go for a Bayern win at around 1.4. If you are scared of that, you can also go for goals, over 2.5.

In Italy, there is the Turin Derby. It is a derby Juventus always win. Juve have struggled without Ronaldo. Ronaldo should play and Juve should win. It comes at around 1.4.

Banana Peels

AC Milan are due a bad result. They go away to Sampdoria, it is a tricky match. AC Milan are top in Serie A, Sampdoria are 11th on the table. If you can, avoid staking an AC Milan win.

Montpellier vs PSG. You can avoid a PSG win. PSG will have their sight on the Champions League match in mid-week. They may not be putting their best foot forward.

Tottenham host Arsenal in the North London derby. The Lillywhites are in good form but it is the type of derby you will want to stay away from. Expect Arteta to set up Arsenal to be compact. Also with some sketchy news on the available players, it is better to stay off this match.

Boald Call

Parma vs Benevento is 16th vs 15th in the Serie A. Parma have a nack of providing shock results. A win against Benvento should not be much of a shocker, the odd is around 2.0, go for it if you are bold.

In the CAF Champions League qualifiers, Stade Malien host Ashanti GB. They won the first leg away from home. You can trust them to finish the job.

Generally, look at the CAF Champions League and Confederations Cup qualifiers. A lot of strong teams are at home and they come at good odds.

May the gods of betting favour you this weekend. As we say, bet responsibly and hold the teams and players responsible if it goes south. If you win, send your tithes to us, make we sef do Christmas.

Thoughts Of A Lunatic: Kroos Pain, Manager Ronaldo and Other Talking Points

The Lunatic is joining the world of football to pay tribute to the legendary Diego Armando Maradona, who was taken home by the hand of God last week. While the debate of the GOAT goes on, the tributes that has followed the passage of Maradona says a lot about his greatness.

To other lunatic matters, it appears the lunatic has been picking on some people or he just hate their guts. Far from it, I am for nobody, I belong to nobody. I say it as I see it. I am particularly pissed with lot of the ticket busters last weekend. How do we do detty December if y’all keep bursting the tickets? Win or lose lots of you collect huge pay cheques and still complain about workload, workload kee you there. Go to Oyingbo market and see workload. Real Madrid, Juventus, PSG, Borussia Dortmund etc. decided to do an Amaka. That thing can pain. Talking about pain, we start on a Kroos pain.

Kroos Pain

When Antoine Griezmann and Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang were not scoring after Toni Kroos called them out for their ‘disrespectful’ goals celebration, we thought they have decided not to score so there won’t be a reason to jubilate.

Griezmann enjoyed scoring again

Apparently, Griezmann had waited for a goal so he could celebrate, more like mock Kroos and he did, after he scored against Osasuna at the weekend. For Aubameyang, we don’t know what is happening. Even shots on target are scarce, not to talk of goals. Play him on the left, play him in the center, Aubameyang keeps firing blanks like the Army of one Country. While their own blanks cause some havoc, Aubameyang’s own does not. One league goal since he signed a new contract, Arsenal fans will be hoping they have not be scammed.

Ighalo’s Excursion

The Odion Ighalo excursion to Old Trafford is obviously over. Except if he has some other duties he performs at Manchester United than the one we know. Maybe he has started helping set cones and arrange bibs in training. He is never seen in the team anymore. Without Cavani, he was behind in the pecking order. Now with Cavani, he is no longer in the pecking order.

Favour over labour don expire

At least, he achieved his dream of playing for the club of his dreams, he also scored some goals and he called the Nigerian government a shame to the world while wearing a Manchester United jersey. His excursion should end soon and he should find his way back to China, fulfilled. Or better still return to the Nigerian League that never has a fixed starting date. Favour over Labour, be like the thing don expire.

Manager Ronaldo

What will Juventus do without their manager Cristiano Ronaldo? Without him, they have only won once in the Serie A this season. Oh! I heard Andrea Pirlo is Juventus’s manager not Ronaldo, pardon me. But there will be no difference with Ronaldo as player-manager as it seems the tactics is, ‘pass it Ronaldo’.

Ronaldo could well be the coach at Juventus

Like Arsenal, Juventus went to appoint a Youth Corper coach, coach wey never do freedom. Maybe they appointed Pirlo based on his brilliance as a footballer, based on that, Ronaldo could as well be the manager.

Enough said. I called Real Madrid penalty donors last week and they did it again. Jose Mourinho and Frank Lampard are busy acting like they never knew each other. Anyways, they are both doing fine on the pitch so no one cares. Once again, Christmas is coming, don’t forget to send gifts to the Lunatic.

Follow Goaldball on Twitter @goaldbal, one L was stolen. And on every other platform on @goaldball.

Thoughts of a Lunatic: Old Staples Stadium, Jubril Messi and Other Football Talking Points

As the second wave of COVID-19 is forcing some governments to lock down their countries again, football fans are hoping football won’t be affected again. Instead, players will defeat COVID-19 to continue doing big things like Cristiano Ronaldo, Zlatan Ibrahimovic, Mikel Arteta and many others.

Or how else will the lunatic think if there is no football? European league football precisely. Even when there was no pandemic, there was little or nothing to say about the Nigerian league not to talk of now. A lot happened in the world of football last weekend, these are the thoughts of the lunatic, to be read with the mind of a Lunatic.

Old Staples Stadium

For clarity sake, there is Old Trafford Stadium and there is Staples Centre (venue of the Grammys). A combination of the two is Old Staples Stadium. Or how else do we call a home stadium that does not feel like home? A home stadium that opponents have turned to a dancefloor. It is better the Grammys is held there and every Beyonce, Rihanna and Cardi B can shake bums there.

Ole Gunnar Solskjaer said there’s little difference between home and away with fans not allowed in the stadiums yet, following the Red Devils defeat to Arsenal at the weekend. One can’t argue with Ole, four league matches, zero win. Arsenal won a league match there for the first time since 2006. Arsenal have won more league matches at Old Trafford than Manchester United this season, fact. Son Heung Min and Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang have danced there. Son was particularly surprising, a Korean danced ‘galala‘ on the Old Trafford pitch.

Aubameyang doing the dance

For Ole and Manchester United fans sake, the earlier the fans return, the better for Manchester United. Else they will be needing a New Trafford soon. And if they are still losing at Old Trafford when the fans return, it means not just that Ole is no more at the wheels, the wheels have fallen off.

Aston Villa, Everton running out of fuel already?

Aston Villa trashed Liverpool 7-2, they were flying and keeping clean sheets some weeks back. However, in their last two matches, they have taken back the seven they gave Liverpool. Three against Leeds, four against Southampton. It seems all the initial show na disguise.

In the same vein, the previously unbeaten Everton have lost their last two against Southampton and Newcastle. Though they have been without James Rodriguez and Richarlison. But if there’s anything we know about James, who has been pivotal to their impressive start, the only thing consistent about him is his good looks. Most of the other times, he is either injured or playing like a Colombian Daniel James. Ask Real Madrid and Bayern Munich fans. Though Everton have a stronger team and bigger coach than Aston Villa. The initial gra gra might be over and both teams have returned to factory settings.

Jubril Messi?

We will have to call a particular Nigerian that is an expert in identifying cloned humans to help. The Messi playing for Barcelona presently, is he Lionel Messi? Jubril Messi? Or Yusuf Messi?

Jubril Messi?

Where is he from? Is he the Argentine we know? Or this particular Messi is from Tahiti or Sao Tome and Principe?

Since Messi fell out with Barcelona at the summer and handed in a transfer request, he has not remained the same. How are we not sure the real Messi has left and the Barcelona board found a clone to replace the Argentine. Or how does one explain a Messi with no goal from open play in the league after six matches? In that time, Cristiano Ronaldo has recovered from COVID-19 to continue scoring. This Messi presently playing for Barcelona is definitely not the GOAT, maybe the pussy (pussycat I mean, take your dirty minds off the gutter).

For Ronald Koeman, some one should tell him that Barca sacked a coach that won a league and was top of the table the following season some times back. Luckily for him (Koeman), Frank De Boer is in charge of the Holland national team. He (Koeman) may have to return to the job he left for the Barca job soon. What about Frank De Boer? Ask Jose Mourinho.

That’s all I wrote and thought on this edition of Thoughts of a Lunatic. Better still, maybe all that is safe for public consumption. There is a level to oro soke weyrey. Keep it a date next time if you are in sync with the thinking of a lunatic, meaning you are a lunatic too.

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