Thought of a Lunatic: Arsenal in their Tent, Farmer’s League Revolt and Other Talking Points

The final bend of the season is here. No more international breaks this season. It is sprint to finish from now. The race is most likely for the swiftest. While some are staying permanently in their new found ‘tent’, some are grasping with trying to return to the top or Continental positions. Some are trying to swim out of the murky waters of relegation.

The Lunatic took some lessons from the world of football last weekend and here are his thoughts.

Arsenal’s Permanent Tent

Arsenal and their Youth Corper coach seems to have found home in tenth. They used to complain about going ‘forth’, so they have found a permanent ‘tent’. At a point under Arsene Wenger, finishing fourth was the standard till they started falling below. With Arsenal in it, it used to be a top-four in the Premier League. When Arsenal and Liverpool fell off, it was expanded to top six. If Arsenal are thinking it will be further expanded to top ten, they better wake up.

The most consisTENTH team in the Premier League

They have consistently held on to tenth this season. When it seems they have started to crawl up the table, they always find a way back to their tent. Against Liverpool last weekend, it was men against toddlers. With their Travis Scott captain, they were completely played out of the park.

The bad news for the Gunners with their empty riffles is they may miss out on Europe entirely next season except they win the Europa League. Let’s start welcoming Arsenal to the midtable club.

Pochettino in the farmer’s league

PSG winning the Ligue One is a giving or supposed to be. The ‘havesters’ have always been head and shoulders above the others in the farmer’s league. But it seems the farmers have revolted against the havesters this season. PSG also have a manager that is not used to harvesting and it seems the farmers have noticed it.

While PSG have made some headway in the Champions League, their poor performance in the Ligue One was highlighted by another home defeat against a top side. They had a chance of going top but blew it at home defeat against Lille. They have now lost five times at home this season. As usual, the returning Neymar gets so competitive in this sort of matches that he gets sent off. Just like he got sent off against Marseille earlier in the season, he got another red card against Lille. Anything to show he is committed to the cause.

PSG have been better in the Champions League

At the other place where Pochettino left in England, chaos is brewing. Jose Mourinho as usual throws his players under the bus in public. Questioned about his team conceding a late goal, something not always attributed to a Mourinho team in the past. ‘Same coach, different players’ he said. Maybe a coach is as good as his players after all. No coach be genius.

Atletico Bottlers

Talking about ‘monkey no get skills, na tree near tree’. Atletico Madrid are close to completing a bottling, even Arsenal will be envious of. At the beginning of the year, Atletico Madrid were 10 points away, with a game in hand. With both Barcelona and Real Madrid struggling, it looked like Atletico Madrid winning their second league title under Diego Simeone was a giving.

Barcelona and Real Madrid are back in form and are breathing down Atletico’s neck. They are both one and three points away from Atletico respectively.

In addition to their tepid display against Chelsea in the Champions League. Someone’s sit should start becoming hot. Passion is not enough for the world’s most expensive manager anymore. He must earn his money by ensuring Atletico see this through.

The Lunatic will rest his pen here. Enjoy the midweek Champions League and Europa League matches. Someone said Chelsea were in good form till a President went to London and they got hit for five at home against West Brom. Porto are waiting.

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Boald Codes: North London Derby, Seville Derby and Other Predictions

Congratulations to those that have followed our calls in the last few weeks, majority of which came through. Just that you have not been paying your tithes here.

We go again. We have gone through the weekend matches to pick the Bankers. They should come through if the players don’t decide to help bookies chop your money. We have the Banana Peels, the matches you should avoid. Some times we are wrong, most times we are correct, you can read previous editions to confirm. Then we chose our Boald Call, only for the brave. Let’s get into our picks for this week.

Bankers

Leicester are valued at around 1.5 for a home win against Sheffield. Sheffield are all but relegated, Leicester are doing all to hold on to a top-four place. Leicester should benefit from a whole week of rest. Go for a Leicester win.

Kelechi Iheanacho is in good form for Leicester

Crystal Palace defeated West Brom 5-1 in the first leg. Both sides are struggling, Crystal Palace have not produced that sort of goals scoring performance again since. West Brom have changed manager since then and are more disciplined defensively. It is a match that will struggle for goals. Under 3.5 comes at around 1.2.

Real Madrid should win at home against struggling Elche. It comes at around 1.24. Or you could go for Real Madrid to win either half.

For the Seville Derby, Sevilla have gone off the boil in recent weeks but should still do enough to avoid defeat at home against Real Betis. Sevilla double chance comes at around 1.2. It is usually a game of goals, you could also go for over 1.5.

Borussia Dortmund, basking from qualifying for the Quarter-finals of the Champions League should win at home against Hertha Berlin or produce an over 2.5. Both comes at around 1.5.

In France, PSG should win at home against Nantes. It comes at around 1.2.

Mbappe and co should get the job done against Nantes

In Russia, leaders Zenit St. Petersburg have struggled since resumption, but should win at home against 11th placed Akhmat, who have lost their last two.

In Turkey, third-placed Fenerbahçe should win at home against bottom-placed Genclerbirligi. It comes at around 1.2.

Benfica are unbeaten in their last six in the Portuguese league, they play at home against 14th placed Boavista. Benfica should win, it comes at around 1.3.

In Uganda, third-placed Express should win at home against Kyetume, who are 13th. Express won the reverse fixture away from home. Express win comes at around 1.3.

In the NPFL, go for Dakkada to win at home against Katsina United, it comes at 1.30.

Banana Peels

If you can, avoid the North London Derby between Arsenal and Tottenham. Both team’s inconsistencies makes it difficult to predict how the tie will shape up.

The London Derby looks finely poised

Be careful with Werder Bremen against Bayern Munich, especially for a Bayern win. A safe bet might be goals. Werder Bremen have lost just one of their last seven.

Cagliari vs Juventus could be tricky. Cagliari are in the relegation zone but have avoided defeat in their last three. They also won this tie last season. Juventus may also still be struggling from the hangover of their Champions League ouster.

Boald Call

In France, fourth-placed Monaco host leaders Lille. If you are brave, go for a Lille win at around 3.2. Both sides are in good form, though Monaco lost their last match. It could go either ways but Lille win is worth risking.

Those are our picks for this week. Wishing you the luck of the green as you bet responsibly.

Thoughts of a Lunatic: Pressure Mounts on Lampard, Record Breaker Messi and other Talking Points

This is football! Anything can happen. This is where heroes turn to villains and villains turn to heroes before you say Mesut Ozil. Arsenal finally got the back of Ozil. Frank Lampard is running out of legendary bias at Chelsea, just as Lionel Messi is bent on leaving Barcelona with no records left. On this edition of Thoughts of a Lunatic, we take a look at some of these talking points in the ever crazy world of football.

Goner Ozil

Mesut Ozil arrived at Arsenal in 2013 to fan fair but has left like a villain. Arsenal fans are divided, some are happy he is finally gone while some chastise the club for treating him badly. While the Lunatic is not taking sides, who gets badly treated by getting paid £350,000 every week for doing nothing? Who gets paid £350,000 for sitting in the stands with an umbrella protecting his delicate skin from the sunlight? Ozil should swap position with an average Nigerian graduate working in a factory in Nigeria owned by a Lebanese and know what ill treatment is.

Arsenal’s g-boy has gone.

There were some moments of brilliance, some assists and some impressive stats but Ozil at Arsenal did not turn out as expected. While he cannot be said to have been an outright flop, he did not have the desired effect either. Luckily for Arsenal, it is at a point when a certain Emile Smith-Rowe has started doing well in the number ten role, it helped the club take attention away from a ‘chasm’ Ozil’s departure might have created.

Like he said, he is happy to be at Fenerbahçe, maybe there is a little left to see or it is just another payday while engaging fans on Twitter, time will tell.

Messi’s Passion

In the past few months, we are beginning to see the side of Lionel Messi we didn’t see in the past. The Argentine showcased the Keane in him with a punch to the face of an opponent – the first time he gets sent off for Barcelona. It is no news Messi wanted to leave at the summer, Barcelona held on, so Messi can help win matches like the Super Cup final. Lo and behold Barcelona lost to Athletico Bilbao and also lost Messi to a two-match ban.

Messi is still breaking records

It is becoming clear that Messi may not belong to the Nou Camp anymore. At a time it seemed the goals scoring numbers has started getting better and we are not only limited to a Penalnel Messi, the man showed his other side. However, it seems Messi is bent on breaking all records before he leaves.

Pressure Mounts on Lampard

Not even Mason Mount will save Frank Lampard when the hammer falls on him. Mount seems to be Lampard’s greatest achievement as a football manager but if results don’t get better, Mount might be following Lampard back to the Championship soon.

Pressure continues to mount on Lampard.

The results and the performances are getting worse. Supposed title challengers are getting sucked into mid-table after splashing the cash on summer arrivals. Many Chelsea fans have brought out their daggers and are calling for Lampard’s head, they don’t even want to remember that he is a club legend. However, Chelsea fans should look at the positives, they longer concede 3 regularly like they used to do. It has been a while since they were bantered with their jersey. On a more serious note, Manchester United fans used to shout #oleout too before but they are top of the table now (not to say things can’t change again) but it is prove that stories can change very quickly in football.

Chelsea fans are not used to this, they don’t make agitations before their managers get fired, things seemed to have changed. They may be stuck to Lampard as Ugandans are stuck with their president, even invading the Stamford Bridge like the Capitol may not change anything.

That is all I wrote on this edition of Thoughts of a Lunatic, till next time, stay blessed.

Arsenal’s Win or Saka’s Goal, Which Was The Fluke?

Arsenal returned to winning ways in the Premier League for the first time since November. In that time they have failed to win against the likes of Burnley, Aston Villa, Southampton, Wolves, including a run of not winning home matches, which included four straight defeats at home. A run that has seen them stuck in the relegation zone, closer to the bottom than to the top. However, they broke that duck when least expected with an impressive win against Chelsea. Have the Gunners turned the tides or have the win against Chelsea was just a flash in the pan?

Kudos to Mikel Arteta for making some big calls or calls he was forced to make. Youngsters Emile Smith-Rowe and Gabriel Martinelli started and added more spark to the attack. Would he have started them if Pierre- Emerick Aubameyang was hundred percent fit or if Willian was available? It was glaring it was the call Arteta should have made earlier but he stuck with the misfiring Aubameyang and Willian alongside the likes of Nicholas Pepe and Alex Lacazette. That it took Arteta long to make or be forced to make the bold calls should be a cause for worry.

There have been calls that the sidelined Mesut Ozil should be called back due to an inability of the team to create chances. Their goals and chances created stats are embarrassing and one that should not be associated with Arsenal of London, maybe Arsenal Tula. They scored three against Chelsea and could have scored more but they still struggled to create clear cut chances. This is easy to argue against. For their ‘dominance’ against Chelsea, two of the goals came from set pieces and the third was a speculative shot many have argued was not intentional, even if it was intentional, it won’t be successful nine out of ten times. The young players played with more energy and pressed Chelsea impressively but is it sustainable?

As we have seen in some of their wins and in some of their struggles, they tend to always move the ball out wide due to an inability to break down teams through the center. The first penalty came as a result of coming in from the flanks. While coming in from the flanks may not be bad, most times their final balls are always poor. We saw that against Chelsea, until Chelsea gave them the breakthrough with the penalty. The second goal was also Saka trying to run in from the flank before he was hacked down for the freekick that led to the second. It was a game in which Edouard Mendy in goals for Chelsea made numerous saves. Apart from scoring the penalty, Lacazette barely touched the ball in the opposition’s box as he regularly dropped deep to link up play. It worked against Chelsea but in truth, we have seen it all before and many teams have set up to nullify it. It was not a tactical ingenuity that Arsenal fans can get overly excited about.

Three goals up and seemingly comfortable, Arsenal found a way to be Arsenal still, they allowed Chelsea back into the match. It was almost three- two and an edgy finale had Bernd Leno not pull up a penalty stop. Their next two matches are against fellow relegation strugglers Brighton and Hove Albion and West Brom. If they are able able to get maximum six points in those matches, Arsenal fans can bring out the sticks of the drums, not the drums yet. But very few Arsenal fans are confident going into the matches still. Brighton have become a sort of a boogey team, they did the double against Arsenal last season. Sam Allardyce is in charge at West Brom, he has a good record against Arsenal.

Arsenal should still see this as a crisis period and do good business in January instead of waiting till the summer, since they have decided to stick with Arteta. Like they did in 2011 after an 8-2 defeat against Manchester United, when they went into the transfer market to do emergency business – that brought Arteta to Arsenal, they should do same in January. The team needs lots of quality. The quality of the players can cover up for some of Arteta’s flaws while he continues to learn the ropes. The win against Chelsea might just be a flash in the pan, there is still lots of work to be done.

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Father Christmas In The Premier League

It is Christmas, the season of good cheer and good tidings. Season to give and receive, depending on the side you belong to.

The season is synonymous with Santa Claus, also known as Father Christmas. As a folkloric tradition goes, Father Christmas is the bringer of gifts during Christmas. …he knows if you have been good or bad so be good for goodness sake.

If Father Christmas visited the Premier League, what will the various Premier League characters be wanting or deserving?

As far as being good goes, Jurgen Klopp and his Liverpool team deserves lots of good gifts for winning the Premier League. When Pep Guardiola took over Manchester City, coupled with the way Manchester City bought every footballer that looked like a star, we thought City will continue to win the league till Guardiola gets tired and leaves for another money bag. Thanks to Klopp for bringing competition to the league. However, Mo Salah will still love to have a captain’s armband from Santa. When the Liverpool captain wears his armband, Salah also wears his. There can be two captains on a ship. Klopp will also like to give gifts to VAR officials, you know, so they can be nicer to him.

For all of Guardiola’s exploits, he has never won the Champions League without Lionel Messi. To seal his reputation at City, he needs the cup with the big ears. Santa should wrap Messi up and send to Pep.

Santa should send red Christmas cards to Arsenal players, since they have developed a love for red cards. They have also become a good donor of three points, they deserve gifts for their benevolence. Arsenal as a club have also been very nice. Which other club pays a player 350,000 pounds per week for doing nothing but run commentary and engage fans on twitter? Which other club also appoints a manager even when he is yet to do his freedom? Arsenal deserve gifts, preferably one that will serve them well in the Championship. Santa should send a baseball cap to Mikel Arteta, and Arsenal have their Spanish Tony Pulis.

On behalf of Nigerians, Santa should give Manchester United bowls of jollof rice. Thanks to them, Odion Ighalo was able to fulfil his childhood dreams of playing for Manchester United. Even if he has become a non-playing staff in the past few months. We even heard he helps to arrange cones during training sessions. All na favour over labour. We heard Ahmed Musa is a Manchester United fan too. Ed Woodward should do the necessary. Musa is presently clubless, else he does an odemwingie and show up at Carrington.

Budweiser, official beer partner of the Premier League should also consider sending beers to Premier League goalkeepers for every goal they concede. Kepa Aribibizagba will drink to stupor.

Big Sam is on a rescue mission to West Brom. He will need a defensive striker like Kevin Davies, they don’t have such at West Brom presently. A player that can throw the ball from the halfway line to the box is also needed. Santa should wrap such players in a box and send to Allardyce.

A time machine for Chris Wilder. Last season, he was wilding. Sheffield United were talked about as European places contenders. This season they are bottom of the league. Just two points from fourteen matches. Defeats are landing on them like punches on Deontay Wilder. All Wilder will need is a time machine that will help him live last season again.

Chelsea may have forgotten to buy Kai Havertz’s manual when they bought him from Bayer Leverkusen. So that the £71m pounds will not waste, Santa should send his manual to Stamford Bridge. Chelsea clamour for rice like they are Nigerians. As rice is expensive in Nigeria, so is rice expensive in London – Declan Rice. Santa should send Rice to Chelsea – whether local or imported.

Ole is always at the wheels. Sometimes, he is fast and steady. Some other times, he is slow and rough. We doubt he has a driver’s license, hence his inconsistency at the wheels. Santa should send a driver’s license to Ole so he can drive Manchester United safely, to Europa League glory.

Merry Christmas to you from Goaldball. Thank you for being on the journey with us. Let us do next year bigger and better.

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Thoughts of a Lunatic: Ole’s Confusion, Chelsea Scammed and Other Talking Points

Merry Christmas to all fellow lunatics – regular readers of Thoughts of a Lunatic, friends of the lunatic, well wishers and witchers.

To football matters, sincerely, I am tired of talking about Arsenal. It seems we are at the point we just wait till the end of the season to see how well they fare in their relegation dogfight. It seems they have appointed a Professor of mathematics as manager. He knows all the stats that proves his team is playing well and should be winning but no one else is seeing those performances and the results. I said I won’t talk Arsenal, to other serious football issues.

Ole’s Confusion

For many Manchester United fans, they don’t know what to make of Ole Gunnar Solskjaer. Sometimes, the results and performances are extremely bad, as in very bad like traffic gridlocks in Lagos. Some other times, it is very good, like we saw last weekend against Leeds United.

Ole was well at the wheels against Leeds United

You would have thought it was Ole that FIFA nominated for The Best Manager of the Year with the way Manchester United dispersed Leeds United. Manchester United tore through Leeds defence like aboki knife through suya.

Manchester United find themselves in the dizzying heights of third with a game in hand and have put themselves in the position of title challengers. This is after an embarrassing ouster from the Champions League to the Europa League. For now, it is all good but don’t be surprised if the shouts of ‘Ole out’ rent the air again in few weeks, the countdown begins 10, 9, 8…..

Chelsea scammed?

There is nothing like a club going all out to splash the cash on a player they expect will come good, only to end up disappointed. Nicholas Pepe is Arsenal’s record signing, from all evidences, na maga money dem pay, he should be the cheapest or better still free. It seems Chelsea have also paid their’s for Kai Havertz. Havertz is looking like Chelsea’s version of Pepe. Their costliest signing of the summer came for a reported £71m. Safe to say he has been the poorest of Chelsea’s summer signings.

Even though Timo Werner is building a reputation of stopping Chelsea’s goals than scoring them, he has still been in action than Havertz.

It is still his first season and he might be one of those players that don’t settle in fast. The earlier he settles in the better or he settles out.

Allardyce’s rescue mission

Mr Jack Bauer started his rescue mission at West Brom on a losing note and with ten men.

Mr. Relegation fighter

Slaven Bilic got a creditable point away at Manchester City in his last match before he was replaced by Big Sam. Maybe Bilic’s sacking was cruel but the end will justify the means.

Allardyce aka ’67 days England manager’ has the enviable record of never losing a relegation fight but na one day juju dey spoil. It is still early days yet, especially if he is able to get some players in the January transfer window, a defensive striker like Kevin Davis will come in handy. Else the season go long like ASUU strike.

Anyways, that’s all on Thoughts of a Lunatic for today. Keep enjoying the beautiful game and the best of this Yuletide.

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Thoughts of a Lunatic: The Best Joke, Arsenal Relegation Materials and Other Talking Points

Christmas on my mind. Not just Christmas, money for some detty December. Lunatic sef need money, no be only you. As everywhere dey red, Christmas red and the other red, Arsenal players are also making it red. Red everywhere, as bet tickets dey red, na so eye dey red.

In the world of football, so many talking points, especially the ones inspired by lunacy.

Arsenal Relegation Materials

When I spoke about new London derbies involving Arsenal, QPR, Brentford and the likes, some people thought I was taking it too far. But it is becoming clearer that Arsenal’s relegation materials are almost complete.

After losing a relegation six-pointer against Burnley at the weekend, they got even closer to the relegation zone. They have a young manager learning the ropes – relegation material. Their football is cross, cross and cross – relegation materials. Lots of substandard players – relegation materials.

Arsenal players are up for the relegation fight

One has to wonder if the players are mistaking the call to attack more for a call to attack their opponents. First, Nicholas Pepe, who can’t nod a ball, nods an opponent. Granit Xhaka, sees that they were playing well, boom, he grabs a neck. Minutes later Mohammed Elneny carries out his own attack. Wahala for Arsenal.

The Best Joke

Cristiano Ronaldo plus Lionel Messi plus anyone else is The Best Joke. No matter what any player does, FIFA must have Messi and Ronaldo on their podium. There is already a default list that includes Ronaldo and Messi, it is only edited to include a third person. At this rate, FIFA will still mistakenly include Messi and Ronaldo after they have retired.

As we have seen, there is a penchant of one of the duo (Ronaldo and Messi) that won’t win the award not turning up for the gala. If it goes as expected this year, none of them should show up. Though it will be held virtually this year, they can also stay away virtually. If Lewandowski don’t win this year, we should forget about FIFA The Best and turn to Davido The Best.

Bielsa is up for The Best manger of the year

When Leeds United manager Marcelo Bielsa made the list of the Manager of the Year, eyebrows were raised but to make matters worse he is in the final three. Bielsa is a celebrated manager for his knowledge and approach to the game, that is where it ends. When did winning the Championship become a big deal? Ladan Bosso should be making the list too, since we want to joke.

Neymar’s Prophecy

On the matter of the Champions League and Europa league draws, there is a lot to look forward to in February. Some interesting ties, one of which is Barcelona taking on PSG. Neymar spoke about playing together with Messi, little did we know he was prophesying the tie. We know Neymar’s other talent apart from playing football, acting. Little did we know he also has the gift of prophecy.

Nagelsmann suit will be an highlight

After sending Manchester United packing, RB Leipzig and their young manager come up against another English side – Liverpool. One thing to look forward to will be Julian Nagelsmann’s suit.

No Need To Panic – Arteta

Arsenal Youth Corper Coach Mikel Arteta has said there is no need to panic as he defended his players effort in their defeat against Burnley. Despite suffering their fourth straight defeat at the Emirates and languishing in fifteenth position on the Premier League table, Arteta chose to remain positive.

‘I wouldn’t say it’s panic,’ he said. ‘I can see in training the way they try and the energy they put in and it was the same tonight.

‘I can see leaders but again we lost the game. We gave the opponent the chance and football is all about winning games.’ Arteta said.

Arteta also said the incident that got midfielder Granit Xhaka sent off was unacceptable.

‘Yes it is unacceptable to do that action but it is because they are so willing to do more, fight more, and on this occasion Granit overstepped the line. We cannot make that mistake because it’s the wrong approach for us.’ Arteta said.

Arsenal’s search for a win continues as Aubameyang scored at the wrong end in the 73rd minute to condemn the Gunners to another defeat, their third in a row.

Thoughts of a Lunatic: New London Derby, Ole In and Out and other Talking Points

What is the world without football? I wonder how people who don’t like football cope. It has been a week of gbas gbos both on the pitch and off the pitch. I am sure you are enjoying the various drama as I have. There is also a lot to look forward to in midweek football. There may be some premium tears. There is also the little matter of a Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo clash in the Champions League. Some years back, it would have been one to look forward to, but now, it looks more like that Mike Tyson vs Roy Jones choreography dance drama.

New London Derby

Change is the only constant thing in life and variety is the spice of life. Arsenal fans have been used to seeing their team play London derbies against the likes of Chelsea, West Ham, Tottenham etc. in the Premier League. There will be nothing bad if they start playing league Derbies against the likes of QPR, Brentford, Millwall and the likes. Not because these clubs are on the verge of gaining promotion to the Premier League but because Arsenal are closer to going to join them.

Areta his doing his IT at Arsenal

Arsenal’s record this season is there for every Arsene, Pier and Mesut to see. They have lost more than they have won. They have conceded more than they have scored. They have celebrated Ozil Twitter jibed than they have celebrated goals.

In the wake of Jose Mourinho giving Arsenal and Mikel Arteta plaudits after his Tottenham side defeated them, Arsenal fans should be worried. Mourinho does not give you plaudits, except when he doesn’t see you as a rival. Mourinho does not see Arsenal as rivals. New rivals on the horizon for Arsenal while their coach completes his IT.

Ole In and Out

Depending on what RB Leipzig does or doesn’t do against Manchester United this week, Manchester United could join Arsenal on the Thursday train. A qualification that looked all but wrapped after a good start in a group that has PSG could end up with a round-of-32 Thursday night tie in Cyprus or Azerbaijan.

The result will also determine the ole in – ole out music. We are used to hearing Ole in one minute and then Ole out the next. In their last two Premier League matches, it was Ole out at halftime but became Ole in by full-time. It could be ole ole ole… the song of the fans or ole! ole! ole!… the song of the market for a thief.

Pogba is said to be unhappy at Manchester United

Still on Manchester United, it seems Paul Pogba has finished his holiday at the club, according to his agent Mino Raiola. A return that was so celebrated like that of a princely prodigal son is about to end with both parties largely disappointed. Pogback is turning to ‘Pogpark and go’.

Barcelona casted

Barcelona are also going down like Arsenal, they may be missing their local rivals too – Espanyol. Another defeat, against Cadiz this time has taken them down to ninth, 12 points away from the top.

In the days when Messi was Messi, this was the type of match he used to win singlehandedly when his teammates don’t turn up. Now that the real Messi has been replaced with Jubril Messi, Barcelona don cast.

In Andre Ter Stegen, Barcelona may be having their own ‘Kepa’. Donating points to opponents with some comedic goalkeeping.

The lunatic is done for today. Tell somebody to tell somebody to keep it a date with the Lunatic and other contents on goaldball.com. Follow us across social media platform @goalball except twitter which is @goalbal (someone took the L). The Lunatic will be back in a jiffy.

How Tottenham Destroyed Arsenal in 10 Pictures

When Mourinho saw Arsenal were Tottenham’s next opponents…

Oh! My favourite meal

How Mourinho prepared for the match

When they had a coach I beat them, talk less of now that a youth corper is in charge

Arsenal fans when they see Harry Kane and Son Heung Min numbers

Massacre loading

Arsenal fans when they heard ‘Partey after partey’ will be playing

Small hope still dey

How Arsenal fans held vigils going into the game

God, let Kane see Holding and see Maldini, put sense inside Willian bushy head...

How Arsenal started the game

We are the Gunners, we mean business, come on

When Tottenham went on the counter

Na premium beating una go chop

What Arsenal offered in the second half

Beautiful nonsense, possession with no substance

Arsenal fans at the end of the match

Which kain life be this, L every week

When an Arsenal fan was woken up at 3:00 am this morning

Have they scored a third goal?

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